{"id":292,"date":"2015-06-13T14:11:05","date_gmt":"2015-06-13T14:11:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/paulfleisher.com\/?p=292"},"modified":"2017-08-12T14:49:40","modified_gmt":"2017-08-12T14:49:40","slug":"reflection-on-the-supreme-courts-loving-decision","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paulfleisher.com\/?p=292","title":{"rendered":"Reflection on the Supreme Court’s Loving Decision"},"content":{"rendered":"

Here’s a short piece<\/a><\/strong> written for the ACLU of Virginia, in anticipation of the Supreme Court ruling on marriage equality.<\/p>\n

Why Loving Matters<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n

In 1973 I moved to Richmond for grad school, and met my future wife. It was love at first sight, or pretty damn close at least on my part. And so we started a relationship that just a few years earlier would have been illegal. The U.S. Supreme Court\u2019s 1967\u00a0Loving<\/span><\/em>decision had recently thrown out Virginia\u2019s anti-miscegenation statute. People of different \u201craces\u201d could legally marry \u2013 which Debra (of African ancestry) and I (Eastern European) did in 1975.<\/span><\/p>\n

The current cases before the Court seeking recognition for same-sex marriages remind many of us of that earlier decision. And of course, like laws banning race-mixing, prohibiting same sex unions ignores thousands of years of actual human behavior.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Paul-Fleisher-and-wife-photo-cropped\"<\/a>\u201cInterracial\u201d dating and marriage is now so ordinary that for all but die-hard segregationists, it has become almost entirely unremarkable. (Although I admit Debra and I feel still pleased when we see \u201cmixed\u201d families featured in television commercials or encounter multiracial couples and their children on the street.) However, we experienced\u00a0much<\/span><\/em>\u00a0less acceptance in mid-1970s Virginia.<\/span><\/p>\n

We didn\u2019t know any other couples in our situation. Cashiers assumed we were separate customers when we stood together in the checkout line. Restaurant hosts didn\u2019t know what to do with us.\u00a0\u00a0 People stared when we were out in public. Once, in a mall parking lot, an entire (white, of course) family walked directly into a parked car as they turned their heads to gawk. We had no shortage of episodes such as that to amuse us.<\/span><\/p>\n

Debra\u2019s family welcomed me into their midst with amazing openness, although her parents surely had concerns about whether she was making the right choice. Becoming part of their family and community has enriched my life beyond measure. I think their generosity is the greatest gift I have ever received.<\/span><\/p>\n

Debra felt welcomed into my family as well, although I doubt that would surprise anyone who knows her \u2013 like her late father she has the ability and inclination to instantaneously befriend almost anyone.<\/span><\/p>\n

I don\u2019t want to make light of the challenges we faced,\u00a0Loving<\/span><\/em>\u00a0notwithstanding. There were some places \u2013 Colonial Heights, for example \u2013 we avoided when possible or transited with care. When we drove south for a Florida vacation, Debra\u2019s parents worried for our safety, and we took precautions other travelers might not.<\/span><\/p>\n

It was difficult for us to find a real estate agent willing to help us find a home. Our marriage limited Debra\u2019s opportunities for professional advancement throughout her entire career. And we don\u2019t fool ourselves into thinking that the bitter remnants of racism and inequality are not\u00a0still<\/span><\/em>\u00a0with us every day.<\/span><\/p>\n

Attitudes towards interracial marriage have changed slowly, but what once was socially unacceptable has become commonplace. Public acceptance of marriage equality for gay and lesbian couples is clearly on that same path, no matter what the U.S. Supreme Court may decide later this month.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Here’s a short piece written for the ACLU of Virginia, in anticipation of the Supreme Court ruling on marriage equality. Why Loving Matters In 1973 I moved to Richmond for grad school, and met my future wife. It was love at first sight, or pretty damn close at least on my part. And so we …<\/p>\n

Continue reading ‘Reflection on the Supreme Court’s Loving Decision’ »<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-292","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nReflection on the Supreme Court's Loving Decision - Paul Fleisher<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/paulfleisher.com\/?p=292\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Reflection on the Supreme Court's Loving Decision - Paul Fleisher\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Here’s a short piece written for the ACLU of Virginia, in anticipation of the Supreme Court ruling on marriage equality. 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